Pep Talks & Apologies

I’m never too good to admit that yes, I too at times fuck up. It’s a part of life and I am human. Where a lot of us differ however, is that I am quick to take accountability for my actions and wrong doings so…..

Pep Talks & Apologies….

I recently had a pep talk with myself on checking folks who aren’t, in my opinion, living up to their full potential.

I basically told myself, “Kilo, you have no room to worry about what everyone else is doing when you are only half way tapping into your OWN power.”

Yes, I am FINALLY over coming years of self doubt. I’m just now truly stepping into my own path. How can I critique or criticize anyone that’s still on their own journey? Girl have several seats!

I sort of wanted to square up with myself but I had to ask myself, why is it so easy for me or ALL of us to pick and pull other folks apart!?

That answer was simple. It’s easy.

At the end of the day, it’s easier to pick other people apart. It’s easier for us to tell other folks that they are ducking up or that they need to chill out and stay on their path. Yet it’s so hard to tell ourselves that we too, be FUCKING UP and HALF ASS’ING SHIT and need to focus on ourselves.

I deleted my page for a few days to have a come to terms with my own shit session and I’m back and better as ever.

And trust me it’s fine to fuck up but be honest with yourselves when you realize that you are you know, tripping. Take time to yourself, isolate yourself, smoke, do yoga DO SOMETHING and chill. Take accountability for your own actions and reactions when it comes to your dealings with people. You’re only in control of yourself.

Now, let’s take some time within this Ted Talk to the discuss the “Age of ASSuming shit.”

People run around ASSuming every damn thing and refuse to get clarity or understanding about things.

We ASSume folks have a problem with us. We ASSume that the weather is going to be amazing because the sun is shining and then we wear shorts outside to be slapped by Jack Frost on a sunny FREEZING Cold day.

We ASSume putting together a book shelf would be simple because by looking at the box, it didn’t look like that many pieces. And I mean black folks never read the instruction manuals. Or is that just me?😊

We ASSume our hair stylist is going to have openings just for us during a busy ass holiday season. We ASSume our cars are going to make it when the gas handle is an inch below ‘E’ because we know our damn cars!

Why the hell are we always ASSuming shit!? It baffles me dawg! Don’t any of you want to know the damn answer? We are so lazy when it comes to looking for and retaining information and we literally have a world of knowledge within our fingertips!

We don’t fact check shit! I’m convinced people just read headlines and share the post just because! Articles be centuries old, celebrities that’s alive and well are dead every three months….

My God. I know Peter Jennings is rolling around in his grave just baffled at the stupidity going on in the world today.

All I’m saying is let’s ALL stop ASSuming shit and ASK questions. But first….

Let’s stop and look at how ASSuming wastes so much time and energy.

My Mother Dear use to always tell me that ASSuming anything only makes an ASS out of you. See what I’ve been doing there? We as humans are already super over imaginative and we live in worlds that we ourselves create in our OWN heads.

Yes, everyone is walking around literally in their own damn world battling their own intergalactic mental battles, warring between the Heaven and the Hell’s that we OURSELVES create. So, most of the issues that we have with people are guess what, OUR OWN issues. I’ve known and have myself created conflicts based off my own issues with folks who probably didn’t even know I existed yet alone knew that I had an issue with them.


We are too afraid to face the real person that looks back at us in the mirror from within. That’s why we project so much on to other people without truly taking a step back and figuring out our own shit first. I’ve done this so many countless times and it’s extremely EXHAUSTING dodging who I truly am. 

But it can be done. Just stop ASSuming shit. Ask someone if they have an issue. Check the weather. Read the damn instruction manual KILO!

I tell myself and my sons often that the change that we seek in the world begins from within. You must be the example of the world that you want to see. None of us can expect change if we don’t change ourselves first. 

Furthermore, as we all know, you can’t change anyone that’s not ready to seek change for themselves. So, a lot of these battles we place ourselves in have already been lost. 


So, when you don’t have the power over someone and you are only in control of your own destiny why criticize, critique, ridicule, offend, clown, roast, troll anyone about their OWN journey?

Doesn’t make sense to me either.

So, for anyone that I’ve recently offended or ridiculed or mocked or shamed for being who they are, I’m sorry. It’s not up to me to tell you where you are wrong when I have my own things that I need to deal with or overcome.

At the end of the day we are who we are or portray ourselves to be. And that’s fine! Until we ourselves individually are tired of playing that role that’s just who we are going to be. I come to you with my deepest apologies for I am wrong and love you all just the way you are.

It’s not up to me to make you be who it is I see you as. I should support you on your journey and only give input that’s asked of me in a way that’s tactful and leaves you in peace.

It’s not easy for anyone to transition. I know this well. It’s a very long hard and never-ending process.

I say all that to say be good to people and yourselves. You never know where someone is on their journey. Always be of light and love and leave a positive impression with folks. It takes a lot to earn someone’s love and trust back.

Shit I myself have learned the hard way.


2 Comments Add yours

  1. Tish says:

    you say that you’re apologizing for the things that you have done to people but you never said what it is that you’ve done to anyone but you always let it be known what’s been done to you. why? I seen where you bashed people before and that’s not right either. You say that you’re human and you make mistakes what about other people can’t they make mistakes to without you talking about them

    1. Kilo Sade says:

      Tish, I appreciate your comment and for you taking the time out to read my post. That means a lot to me. As I deep dive within my blog As well as our podcast I’ll get into stories where I have been wrong as I have before. I am far from perfect but have come a mighty long way. And I agree we all are human. However this post was me coming face to face with interfering with someone else’s journey. I’ve never been the type to talk bad about someone I love behind their back. Anything I’ve said was directly when I was ready or confronted and I always stand my ground. But the thing is it still wasn’t my place to say anything to them about how they live their life. It’s not my place to criticize them on their transition. That is what my post is about. And when folks ASSume things. Which is ironic…. we live we learn we all grow. It’s a never ending journey and again we are all human.

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