Repetitive Trauma

This morning as I was taking my youngest Sons to their Granny’s house. I took my normal turn on the street leading there and stumbled upon a group of young boys jumping on two other boys.

I instantly stopped the car, turned around, and went the opposite direction.

My instinct instantly was to get my babies out of harms way.

You never know if someone is carrying a weapon or not.

Once I dropped them off I went back down that way to see if the commotion was still going and to do as I normally do, intervene, which I know I know it’s dangerous.

To my surprise, when I got back not only was I right about my instinct, one of the kids was carrying a weapon, and surprisingly an older Woman was there INSTIGATING IT ALL.

My blood boiled.

The other two kids had left apparently. And the Woman was still there gassing the situation on.

“They can call you whoever.” She shouted.

I just kept going. How can you speak to that?

Of course I don’t know the details. However, I know what it’s like to be a kid in the midst of being encouraged by Adults to act on your anger the wrong way.

We fought all the time as kids. We thought it was cool I suppose. It wasn’t until my Aunty was shot in her head that I realized that this shit wasn’t normal.

Fighting for absolutely nothing. Having nothing. If she would have died that day we would have all been homeless because we depended on her home for stability. It was then that I realized that I didn’t want to fight anymore.

That was my first shift as a child.

Fighting became my last alternative and only done when necessary.

When my God Sister got jumped it was necessary.

If I had a problem with someone I’d talk it out with them. I’ve never truly had a fight with someone based off of my own problem. It’s always been me defending someone else and even still it was never worth throwing hands about.

As an Grown Ass Woman. You will NEVER see me pulling up with my kids to fight a soul! If I even hear about my Sons fighting I’m going to be HEATED. For what? What are you fighting for? Of all the battles in this World worthy of fighting, fighting another person that’s black, young , and as rightfully angry at the World as you just isn’t the solution.

Like carrying guns? Really as many kids are dropping left and right. I will never introduce or condone my children to that type of behavior and don’t want it around them at all.

I couldn’t imagine being one of the parents of those little boys jumped. I would have been MURDEROUS someone jumped on one of mine.

Like what are we doing here!? Why aren’t we seeing the errors of our ways!? Why are we encouraging our young men and women to fight rather than to communicate effectively?

I’m absolutely sick of it! Babies are literally dying and Grown ups will literally stand around and watch the shit go on and be on the midst of it doing absolutely nothing about it at all.

Then feeling remorseful when it’s their child on a tshirt like we didn’t know what was going on?

Like how many more wake up calls do we need to endure before we say enough is enough? That we are tired of flooding funeral homes with the stained bodies of our children?

We as Parents are supposed to set better examples not be apart of the bad example our children are already subjected to through music and television.

I was disappointed this morning man.

We have to do better.

Published by Kilo Sade

These things can be so trivial so I’ll give a quick synopsis: I am Love. I am Light. Sometimes I’m wrong. Sometimes I’m right. Sometimes I’m low. Sometimes I get high. But at the end of the day I just live true to self throughout this life. That was hella cheesy but that’s me. Asé I’m also a 34 year old Working Mother of 4 boys (pray for me), lover to D2 (swoon), Sistar, Loc’d Goddess, Crystal Healing, Card Reading, Herb brewing, poem writing, hair styling, earth loving, pet whispering REBEL. Follow me on Instagram: @heykilocares

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