You ever feel like when you are at a pivotal moment of your life when you know some astronomically amazing shit is about to take off and it’s like that final leg of bullshit obstacles hits you all at once. Now, typically you’d throw in the towel and say, FUCK IT ALL.
Yeah, life’s been life-ing alright and surprisingly, I am nowhere near ready to throw in the towel. I’ve been eating my breakfast for champions and despite things not going the way I want them to I am absolutely seeing and feeling abundance and balance coming my way.
My computer is literally my lifeline, or it was before my 5 year old demolished it. Along with it my cookbook and quite a bit of content I was working on. And though as frustrating as it is it’s not the end of the World. It can and will be replaced and if anything, I’m going to make something even greater.
Everything happens for a reason and I needed that to happen so that I could realize what it is I really need to be focusing on. ME. My peace of mind, my reality, my desires. I’m ready to focus on me and the things that make me feel alive moving forward for the next 6 months of the year.
How can I pour into anything or anyone else when I myself have been feeling on edge and depleted. On E like a muh’fucka. I need a vacation, a break, a full day of reading and studying, a day at a spa, a massage, a hair appointment. Look I need the WORKS!
This will also help me to create, to not be so grouchy because I have been Oscar the grouch lately and I really hate it. I don’t like it. Granted I have boundaries but I feel like I’ve just been on edge with those that I love but I feel like I was more so outcrying for peace and space to recuperate and recharge and I didn’t know how to express it without offending. I can’t worry about offending anyone though, I got to get my mind right and if folks don’t understand this I don’t know what else to tell them.
I got to find my peace of mind and I want to stop snapping! I feel like a damn snapping turtle. I hate it here. Mercury Retrograde has really made me face not being vocal for ME!
I got some big things coming up and it’s going to require my time and attention. Kilo Cares is not a hobby it is ME! It’s ME. It is ME! And I just need folks to understand and respect that.